Define Winning
by David J. Knight
Summary: When a simple situation at a bar threatens to turn into something worse, Kirk throws away his self-centeredness to save someone else... and to show Uhura how he defines winning. One-shot.


_**Define Winning**_

The **Cabin Fever Bar** didn't really have the best booze, but it did have the best music and absolutely exquisite dancers. For those two reasons alone, Jim found himself begging Bones to accompany him for a night full of fun.

"I can't, I have to study", was the reply from the stubborn doctor.

"Bull", Jim called. "You already finished your essay on infectious diseases on Zal... Zal-whatsitcalled."

"Zalvario", Bones corrected him, sitting at his desk. "I'm not going partying with you tonight. I'm a doctor, not a teenager."

Jim ran a hand over his face. "Jesus. Do you have any idea how hard it is to get you to have a good time?"

"Do you have any idea how hard it is to patch you up every time you have a 'good time'?"

"No, but I'm sure you'll tell me."

"It sets me back for the next two days because I spend the night _awake_ fixing your busted nose or other appendage you've deemed ready for desecration", Bones informed him. "And you're allergic to every goddamn drug in the galaxy."

Jim grinned. "I like to keep you at the top of your game."

"I'm sure you do, cheeky bastard."

"So is that a 'Yes I'll go, Jim, if you stop bugging me'?"

"No, it's a 'Go away or your neck will be swollen because of the amount of hypos I'll give you'."

Jim walked out the door, whistling merrily. "I'll see you there", he called back. Bones cursed again as the door shut behind him.

Sure enough, Jim found Bones only a few minutes late at the **Cabin Fever Bar**. He clapped him on the back and led him inside to the swirling mass of drunks and partygoers who were all consuming their fair share of alcohol.

Finding two seats at the bar, Jim sat next to Bones and ordered a few beers to start the night off. He looked around at the crowd leisurely, allowing his eyes to settle on one of the young dancers currently gracing the floor. He grinned outwardly as he marked his target and he could hear Bones muttering.

A familiar swirl of dark hair he knew caught his attention at one of the tables. Jim set his sights on the group of people he know recognized as cadets and immediately identified Uhura in their midst.

He nudged Bones. "Hey, check it out", he said, pointing.

The older man grunted. "Yeah, great, go ruin her night if it makes you happy."

Jim smirked. "You know she loves it, and I know you enjoy the show."

Bones received a shot of something and downed it. "Yeah, and I'm also captain of the _Enterprise_."

"Hands off my ship, Bones", Jim warned good-naturedly. "Alright, I'm thinking of names. I think I'm going to try Rumplestiltskin this time."

Bones choked on his alcohol. "Jesus, Jim, do you want your testicles to be chopped off with a razor blade?"

Jim laughed. As he made to get up from his seat, another man beat him to the punch. Jim almost cursed, then thought better of it and smirked. Cupcake was sure going to _love_ getting rejected.

As predicted, the burly cadet leaned on the corner table Uhura and her friends were sitting at. Jim was privileged his bald head did not block Uhura's face. Reading his mouth, Jim guessed at his words and grinned when he saw the elusive princess of a cadet smoothly say, "No thanks."

Jim grinned again and thought about turning back to the bar when he saw Cupcake move slightly closer, toward Uhura's face, and he moved backwards in disgust, likely at his breath. Kirk eyed Cupcake's body movements, saw his legs were slightly unsteady, rocking just a bit. He was drunk.

Uh oh. This could turn into something funny to something not-so-amusing after all.

"Bones", he said, again pointing to Uhura's table.

"What?" he asked gruffly, turning. He espied Cupcake as Uhura said more forcefully, "No."

"Oh. Whatd'ya the chances of this getting ugly are?"

Jim replied truthfully, "Normally I wouldn't worry about it, but Cakie's been drinking. He's a big, alpha-male guy. Uhura's a stunning, snippy woman. Those three don't usually end up with the members of the group holding hands and singing Kumbaya."

Bones nodded. "Mmhmm."

Jim saw the side of Cupcake's face grow steadily more red and angry as Uhura matched his temper. Her friends watched the exchange with a mixture of concern, amusement, and ridicule. Cupcake reached over and grabbed Uhura's arm.

Jim took another swallow of beer. "I think I feel like starting a bar fight tonight. Sorry about your classes for the next two days, Bones. Get her out, would you?"

Bones nodded ruefully as Jim left the bar and headed for Uhura. He shook his head and took a sip of his cognac. "Chivalry changes forms", he muttered to himself, "but it sure as hell ain't dead."

Jim arrived at the table as Cupcake shouted, "You can't say no to me!"

"I just did!" Uhura snapped. "Take a hint and back off, barfly!"

Cupcake's face tightened more and he slurred, "That's it, you bitch!" and he moved his arm as if to slap her across the face...

Which was when Jim, in perfect dramatic elegance, and tapped Cupcake on the shoulder. The hunk of meat turned around to meet Jim's face connecting squarely with his jaw. The cadet went tumbling to the floor with a satisfying thud.

Jim grinned at the assembled group of women. "Hey, Rumplestiltskin", he said to Uhura, whose face managed to somehow emanate rage, irritation, and gratitude at the same time.

Cupcake moaned on the floor for a moment, and on cue Pop Tart, Creme Puff, and Twinkie moved toward their fallen friend. They all laid eyes on Kirk and one of them cracked his knuckles.

Jim just grinned at them as Bones, also on cue, gestured with his hands to the ladies. They moved out from the corner table as Jim ducked a wild punch and returned with one of his own, catching Puff in the face.

Once they were outside, Bones turned back to re-enter the bar. Uhura called for him to wait, but he instead pulled out a hypospray he saved for situations similar but not identical to these.

Apparently a few seconds was all Jim needed to end up on his back on a table with the snot being beat out of him. Bleeding from his mouth and nose, he was singing as Creme Puff punched away at his face, "Puff, the -_PUNCH-_ magic dragon -_PUNCH-_ here by the sea -_PUNCH-_..."

Bones walked swiftly up to Creme Puff, jabbed the hypo into his neck, and watched him crumple to the floor like a sack of potatoes. Jim stood and spat out blood and tumbled to the ground, his trademark smirk still on his face.

"Aw, come on, Bones", he complained. "I had 'em right where I wanted 'em."

"I'm sure", Bones replied sarcastically. "Come on, kid, let's go..."

"HEY!!!!" Cupcake bellowed. Jim and Bones turned back to him. The broad-chested cadet pointed a finger at Kirk. "We want him", he demanded.

Jim looked at Bones and winked, breathing heavily. He moved slightly closer to Cupcake and the three other processed treats. He smirked his widest smirk yet. "You surrender?" he asked innocently.

Cupcake growled and moved himself forward. Jim, making a tactical decision based on the fact that the idiot was intoxicated, reached to his left and tipped the table forward as Cupcake raised his fist.

The moron stumbled slightly as the table interrupted his movement and Jim again slammed his fist into the other man's jaw. Cupcake went down on top of the table, crushing it beneath him and splattering drinks and food all over the surrounding area.

Jim made another tactical decision and ran for it as Puff and the others reacted and sprinted after Jim and Bones. As they reached the door, Jim swung it open and moved through. Just as he thought he was home free, something made contact with his head and he fell forward to the pavement. Distantly he heard Bones call his name...

A while later he awoke to warmth and a soft pillow underneath his skull, which began throbbing instantly. He groaned and opened his eyes slowly, blinking to adjust to light coming from a ceiling.

He rubbed his eyes. "Ugh... Bones, what happened?"

The voice that answered was definitely not Bones. "He went to go get you some painkillers that you're not allergic to." Jim blinked rapidly and turned to see Uhura sitting on a chair next to the bed he was laying on.

Jim's face contorted in confusion. "Wha- Uhura... what?"

She shut down the PADD she had been reading. "You were exiting the bar and one of the guys smashed a beer bottle to your head... in front of a policeman. You went out cold." Jim felt his head throb harder at the mentioning of the incident.

"And we got away?"

She bit her lip. "Yeah, we left right after when I promised to take you to a medical facility. I brought you here so you wouldn't get in trouble, because, you know, Starfleet would investigate the whole thing and..."

Jim stared at her for a moment, then grinned widely. "My, my, Miss Uhura, you're not actually _helping_ Jim Kirk, are you?"

She shook her head but allowed a tiny grin to surface. "You could be on the floor right now."

Jim chuckled, winced as his head hurt more. "Point taken", he replied, closing his eyes again. "What happened to Cupcake?"

Uhura laughed softly. "He's in... I don't know, someplace with bars for a day or two. Police pinned it all on him and his friends." She paused, then said, "And, some people provided eye witness reports."

Jim said, "Aww, thanks a million Romilda."

Uhura's jaw tightened, though it was not as serious as it usually was. "Romilda? Really?"

"What?" Jim asked. "It's exotic."

They both sat quietly for a while, almost to the point where Jim fell asleep, when Uhura said, "I'm sorry... Jim."

He moaned, opened his eyes again. "For what?"

She gestured at his beaten state. "For-" she seemed uncomfortable saying what she was thinking.

Jim shrugged. "I don't know why. I mean, I won, right? No harm done."

Uhura looked at him strangely. "Jim, I know your ego is big, but not _that_ big. You got beaten to a pulp... again... that's not winning."

Jim shrugged again. "Depends on how you define winning." Uhura opened her mouth to retort, then closed it as she realized what he had said. "You're fine, right?"

He said the words without any of his usual bravado and immaturity. Uhura looked down at the floor, abashed. "Thank you, Jim."

He smiled slightly. "Anytime, beautiful Katie."

All of her irritation returned. "God, you really know how to ruin a moment, don't you?"

"It's a talent."

"Seriously, Jim... I appreciate it."

"Well, obviously", Jim said, his smile growing with his every word, "because I'm laying in your bed. I knew it was bound to happen, just not like this..."

The appreciation for his humor landed him outside her dorm, in the hallway, chuckling to himself.


End file.
